RisqueSommelier.com

Massenez Eau de Vie Poire William avec Poire prisonniere 

Is there anything sweeter than a glorious rim job… and sugar makes it that much better.  Of course, Risqué is speaking of Poire William “Sidecar”.  The Eau-de-Vie pear brandy (pear in the bottle) literally means “Water of Life” and Risqué is no dissenter.  One would ask “How do they get something so big through such a little hole?”  Well, the mystery explained, empty bottles are well hung on the trees and the young fruit bud is then carefully inserted inside each bottle and aloud to explode to maturity.  When the pears have developed the bottle and pears are washed and Brandy is added to the bottles and sealed.  Note: To all my LUSHES, it is important to always keep the pair covered with brandy at all times or it will rot. 

Poire Williams is an orgasm of pale florals, with delicious sweet acacia and night blooming jasmine. Upon the tongue are attitudes of prevalent lemon verbena and mint accentuated by strong and obvious perfumed Anjou pear.   

LUSHES …share Poire Williams “Sidecar” amongst yourselves. 

Poire Williams “Sidecar” 

Edna 2006 Pinot Noir, Paragon

Every now and again Risqué Sommelier loves to get his hands dirty and saunter in the kitchen to cook.  For this menu he chose to prepare a Fabu chicken (organic of course) and wild mushrooms – Chanterelle, morel and lobster.  And being that all of Risqué’s favorite Lushes have been trained in proper wine etiquette and the ability to select fabulous wines, wine Lushes Jim and Colleen brought Edna Valley’s 2006 Pinot Noir.  Excellent luscious Lushes …

The Edna Valley Vineyard 2006 Pinot Noir has the propositioning scent of pl.ayful cherries, mixed berries, thick caramel and ending in a smokey finish.  Risqué and his Lushes entertained their taste buds the beautiful rich black cherry and robust berry characteristics while sinking into the nice soft silky tannins.

 

Once again the Lushes proved themselves as being worthy of their highly esteemed position… Lucious! 

Alcohol 13.8% ($20)

Paul Dolan Vineyards 2006 Sauvignon Blanc, Mendocino County

Orgasmic is certainly on Risqué’s radar and having a little Organic thrown in is no disappointment as well!!! Paul Dolan is committed to sustained agriculture and the environment. This philosophy translates into the commitment to the quality of the product as well as the healthy and whole aspect of business, including a moral center with values considering greater world.

A very light golden hue holds a giant surprise as the mouth explodes with juicy green lime, tangerines and luscious kiwi fruit against a pungent grapefruit and honeysuckle nose settling into a tangy citrus finish.

Any man with a gorgeous core and a delicious coating is right up Risqué’s alley and so is Paul Dolan’s Sauvignon Blanc!!! So, if climax is on your radar as well as Sauvignon Blanc… suck down a little Paul Dolan! Donated Product

Alcohol 13.5% ($18)

A Thirsty Drag Queen A disheveled drag queen goes into a wine bar and plops herself down on a barstool. The hunky shirtless bartender smiles and winks at her and says, “What’ll it be, Honey?” The drag queen says. “Give me ten glasses of the house white.”  The bartender fills her request and watches as she guzzles one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all ten are gone. Staring in amazement, the bartender asks why she’s doing all this drinking.  “You’d drink them this fast too if you had what I have.”  The bartender compassionately asks, “What do you have?” The drag queen replies, “I have a dollar.”

Geoffrey Laurence – “Steve and Steven”

Painting 1995-1996   

This painting quickly caught Risqué’s attention as the emotions captivated by Geoffrey Laurence in “Steven and Steven” portray a breathtaking touch of compelling sadness and tremendous longing between two men.  Geoffrey is able to orchestrate a difficult execution of creating an emotional response by conveying strong emotions of love, tenderness, compassion, apprehension, contemplation, weakness and angst. Remarkably good art engages the viewer and Risqué has been understandably caught up in the chorus of this emotional narrative. 

Risqué encourages everyone to visit Geoffrey Laurence’s website to view the fabulously contemplative art where one can feel the power of emotion through Geoffrey’s work.

Curtis 2005 Heritage Blanc, Santa Barbara

Ever wonder where the rubber hits the vine?  Well, Risqué would inform you that it is at the Curtis Winery, a smaller winery owned by the Firestone Vineyard.  Yes, Firestone as the same Firestone that sells tires and the renowned Firestone Wines.  The Curtis Winery has a narrower focus for Rhône style wines, which just so happen to be some of Risqué’s favorites.  While imbibing at one of his regular wine jaunts with LUSHES at hand, Risqué was presented a glass of the 2005 Heritage Blanc (Viognier 68%, Roussanne 32%).   

This light colored libation produces a nosegay of pink grapefruit, fresh bright green bay leaf and a tickle of dill weed.  Caressing Risqué’s tongue were mouthfuls of honeysuckle, ripe fig, more grapefruity citrus all tied up with a nice toasty note.

A pleasurable experience was had by all, but the most amusing nuance was the scent of the cork…it smelled just like a big ol’ green Dill Pickle!  Maybe it should be, “Where rubber hits the pickle”? 

Alcohol: 15.6%

Domaine Chandon 2005 Chardonnay, Carneros

Risqué and his LUSHES have enjoyed an opportunity to visit the French owned Domaine Chandon winery, being quite pleased with the sophistication and character of their sparkling wines. But to the LUSHES surprise, the 2005 chardonnay had caught Risqué’s attention above the sparkling wines. It must have been a wine thang!

The amusement came from the breath of ripe fig, Anjou pear, white peach, fragrant orange blossoms and an insinuation of praline. Soon to follow was the crisp creamy textured tastes of nectar sweet honey, fig, smooth citrus, fresh ginger, light oak and concludes with a lingering finish.

Sparkling or not, it is a wine thang…

Alcohol 14.3% ($18)

Bessie Braddock, a well-known socialist in England, attended a dinner party at which she was seated next to Winston Churchill who had had quite a bit to drink. She said to him, “Winston, you are drunk!”He replied, “Madame, I may be drunk, but you are ugly, and tomorrow I will be sober.”

Tait 2006 “The Ball Buster”, Barossa Valley, South Australia

There are many definitions out there for “Ball Buster” such as “a demanding woman who destroys men’s confidence” or “a job or situation that is demanding and arduous and punishing”. Nevertheless, Risqué would rather resort to playing with… than busting balls. But when it came to tasting the Tait 2006 “The Ball Buster”, Risqué could not wait to amuse his ball busting tongue with the lushes Shiraz (78%), Cabernet Sauvignon (12%) and Merlot (10%) grapes.

The Ball Buster has a beautiful deep dark jammy red hue and with a simple swirl of the glass it produces some nice long legs. The huge scent is of blackberry jam, little hints of spice, buttery caramel and latex/rubber which all become a fun and pleasing to the nose. One sip reveals a Ball Busting big jam taste of blackberries and black currants with some spice, cedar and tar all with a velvety finish.

Risqué enjoyed the nose more than the taste as the nose showed more distinct characteristics where the taste boasted mostly of huge jam. If you’re in the mood for a Ball Buster, Risqué would recommend this one from down under!

Alcohol: 15.7% ($25)

Argyle 2004 Nuthouse Reserve Series Pinot Noir, Willamette Valley

Amusing are the queer wine labels that one comes across from wine bar to wine bar. While perusing the one of many favorite wine bars, Risqué noticed through the corner of his eye the Argyle Nuthouse label. With an eyebrow raised and a crinkle of the nose, Risqué couldn’t help but reached for the bottle to satisfy his eccentric and curious wine interests.

The wine shows of an unfiltered raspberry in color. The aroma reveals scents of buttered toffee, cola and hints of wild raspberry and strawberry. In the mouth is the fond flavor of nutty toffee, cola and as one or Risqué’s Lushes described, “Berryrama” meaning lots of berry – black, blue, raspberry and strawberry. The wine is a little hot and tannic when first opened but benefits from being decanted. Nuthouse Pinot Noir will be a fun addition to any wine cellar.

Although Wine Spectator rated the Nuthouse at a generous “93” points, Risqué would be generous and rate it with raised eyebrow and “90” amusing points. Unfortunately the winery is sold out so purchases will have to be made from a favorable wine store or one of the online wine stores that pop-up first when you Google anything “Wine”.

14.5% ($45)